Come and Get Me

By meg.foulkes

Mon, 04 Jul 2011
  • 379 reads
1 comments
 

My sleeves are dripping with hearts
Too much for the taking. How long can I be
Open like this, beckoning friends to see inside.
Then I would have said this transparency
Is noble, now it is become desperate
As well, like a grubby sandwich board
Hanging down, saying help yourself.

Certificate U
Poem
Autobiography

Comments

Submitted by maisie on
hi meg, line 5 *has* not *it* and the term *like* could perhaps be changed or cut, so that the line isn't so clumsy, its like having a case of *but's* doesn't always add anything. "As well, like a grubby sandwich board" As well, a grubby sandwich board" thanks

maisie angel Guess what?  I'm still alive!