To hold just once
By Parson Thru
Sat, 23 Jul 2011
- 2087 reads
7 comments
I’m vomiting colours
- blue
a deep aquamarine hue
I hear time slip away,
shuffling past
the empty open door
The night fills with
your name
dark, musk, but stale
I drown in pools of green
but fail, again,
to recognise the taste of tears
Offer me your hand
to hold just once
and never to return
Give me just your life
and, I swear,
I’ll ask for nothing more
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Comments
What with the opening line
Permalink Submitted by RachelPatricia on
What with the opening line featuring the word 'vomiting' and all, it was a complete surprise to watch this unfurl into such a beautiful poem - really enjoyed this, many congrats on the cherries :)
Thought of a title yet?
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Ha! I like Jason, but what
Permalink Submitted by RachelPatricia on
Ha! I like Jason, but what about 'The Taste of Tears' or 'To Hold Just Once' - I struggle a lot with titles sometimes and just choose a line that fits the majority of the time, and I think these are two of the most beautiful lines in this poem, just a suggestion ;)
Rachel xx
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Parrot? I only remember the
Permalink Submitted by RachelPatricia on
Parrot? I only remember the cats, Karrie and Okie! (though I think they were spelt more like the Friday night phenomenon known as Kareoke, or is that Karaoke? Never can tell)
Glad to be of service, Parson ;)
Rachel xx
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