This day has finally come

This is such a lovely poem for your wife, such sentiment expressed, Howeverm, I feel you could make it even better if it 'scanned' properly - try counting the syllables on each like and you'll see what I mean, J x

Right: This day has finally come = 7 when the two of us will unite as one = 10 The day of extensive anticipation = 11 Will bring much joy and elation = 8 Today will live forever in our hearts = 10 For what we have no one will tear apart =10 As I become your husband and you my wife = 11 Together we embark upon a new life. = 11 To have and to hold for sickness and in health = 11 Staying together even despite decreasing wealth = 13 Anything set before us we can get through = 11 As long as we are together and I have you = 12 The deep adoration possessed by you I = 11 Will only strengthen as time goes by = 9 Our love never fading others ask how = 10 with you together forever is my solemn vow = 13 Do you see how they are all uneven? In a rhythmical poem, you need to have patterns of syllables, either: a e.g. 8 b e.g. 10 a e.g. 8 b e.g. 10 or a e.g. 7 a e.g. 7 a e.g. 7 a e.g. 7 or a a a b etc, with all stanzas echoing each other, unless you want one to stand out for dramatic effect. Does this help?

I have an English degree and I am an English teacher. I also read a lot - I always have two or three books on my bedside table! I enjoy helping others to do the best they can and I also like people to criticise my pieces and help me to improve them - we are all learning! Glad to be of help! J x

This is good Pinda, I was expecting to see rap on the page; which I couldn't imagine working. The wording is great and the sentiment is class too. Enjoyed and sorry to have pre-judged before I actually read; there's a lesson in there somewhere ;) I suppose rap is poetry anyway when you think of it. Chris ;)

This is really lovely Pinda, beautifully expressed in my opionion. Sarah x