The Ecstasy of Carmen Manning (excerpt)

CARMEN and ALEX:          I keep having this dream:

CARMEN:   about an angel with this round face and short hair that doesn’t move, even when it leans over, like a statue, you know? And it’s floating above me. I’m in my bed, except it’s not my bed, it’s white painted metal, like a child’s bed, but it’s huge, it’s the biggest bed I’ve ever seen. And for a moment, I’m elsewhere, above, and I see myself curled on these pale blue sheets… peaceful… and the bed is floating in nothingness really, and I think there’s a waterfall, I can hear a roar, and there’s mist in the air and on my skin. I’m back in the bed, staring up at the angel, and it has this look, this piercing look, that hurts me. And the longer it stares, the more it hurts. Everything… this whole body ache, and then the fever sets in. I think my blood is boiling, it feels like it. My skin is turning black in places, charred from the inside out. And the angel hovers closer over me, I can feel its breath. It’s sweet, but too strong that it overwhelms me, like jasmine and gardenias. And the smell gets stronger and the mist gets heavier and my skin gets hotter, and I stop breathing.

ALEX:     …this dream where my hands are on fire. And it doesn’t hurt all that much, but I can’t put them out. I look at my hands, and I can see the pale flesh through the blue flames. It’s so surreal, and I can’t make it go away. I go to the bathtub, and I plunge my hands into the water and for a second the water turns blue so I pull them out, but they are still lit. I wave them around and then I’m running down the street passing people, but I don’t think they can see the flames. And then I run into you, and you can see the flames. And then I thrust my hands into your stomach and the fire goes out, so I pull my hands out of you, but then I look at you, and your face… is awful, and then you turn away. And then it’s over.

CARMEN and ALEX:          And then I wake up. And you’re not there. And I’m alone.