Knowledge of Porridge

KNOWLEDGE OF PORRIDGE
----------------------
(Lyrics adapting nineteenth century Poet Laureate Robert Southey's
original, pre-Goldilocks telling of "The Story of the Three Bears" to
fit a 101 Strings musical rendition of a Jerry Bock melody taken from
"Fiddler on the Roof")

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DA WORDS ----->

Picture a sylvan scene, deceptively serene
Each plant painted pristine, with brambles in between
Their thorny spines incline
The dreamer to divine
That spells enthral these dells
So watch where you recline

Nature's barbed wire dampens the desire
To express a trespass
But it can't prevent
People from peeping
Covetously creeping
Nimbly when the chance is sent

A wicked old woman was wand'ring in the woods
And wond'ring to herself where she might pilfer goods
With minimal effort this criminal sort sought
A latch left off the catch, security at nought

The house was vacant but its contents fragrant
So the impish vagrant very flagrantly
Got the hot pots of breakfast that were cooling
Drooling over portions scant

Her great discomfiture was that the temp'rature
Of ev'ry serving was unnerving to endure
And as she cursed and swore, her chosen seating tore
So she retired to bed since theiving's such a chore

Meanwhile, returning, traipsed a hungry trio
Didn't want to be so peckish past this point
They gave the heave-ho to the short reprieve
Awarded to their joyful joint

And found that their cottage had suffered a rampage
Victims of a pilage tailored to enrage
Who might they engage to answer for an outrage
Hooligans could not upstage ?

Well, inspection is the seed of detection it is said
And inflection, if shrill, may inflict shreds of dread
Witness three bears a-skipping up the stairs
They'll soon forget their cares, their target mumble prayers
To try to silence violence in the
Sneaking, shrieking, squeaking, speaking
Of a Little Small Wee Bear who's sad to find his chair
Is now well past repair

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