People think that I'm a horse because of my ugly horse face. When I go to the track, everybody thinks that I'm there to race. I look so much like a horse that people put a feed bag on my head.
I own a beauty parlor but I always get things wrong. Last week I left a lady under the dryer far too long. She was under the dryer for hours and it fried her brain.
I'm Boss Hogg and Rosco keeps trying to eat my food. It's been my dream to see Daisy Duke in the nude. The Duke boys keep fighting me because I'm a crook.
I have great news about the two women who were shot. I was afraid that Alexia and Janet would die but they did not. They're out of the hospital and are recovering at their homes.
Let me tell you about a man who is severely depressed. He learned the hard way that money can't buy happiness. He thought he'd never be unhappy again when he won the 250 million dollar lottery.
