Sprung! (Inspiration Point)
By jennifer
Wed, 04 Mar 2009
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8 comments
Sprung! (4th March, 2009, 6.59pm)
Spring the lock on my drawers;
undo the ties that bind me to the past;
allow the parts to re-align
as the sun slides through the curtains,
I sigh: long may it last!
Let the crocuses bloom,
poking their inquisitive green fingers
up through the moist, dark soil;
prepare the earth for planting:
plough your furrow, boy!
Open your lungs with the joy
of spring, as we bound on sprung,
metallic strings like puppets;
swing, swing, feel the earth move
as she prepares for Spring!
Let the shoots spurt up through
the well-dug crust; let them bloom
and fill the room with the scent
of nature; listen as we close the door
on Winter; do not lament.
Jennifer Pickup
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Comments
Now this, I love!! And as
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Now this, I love!!
And as for the line:-
"Plough your furrow, boy !"
I'm certainly all for that:-)
Nice one, Jennifer. I'm off to read it to my partner in the hope that it inspires them ... to do some gardening, of course;-)
T X
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really liked this too - all
Permalink Submitted by littleditty on
really liked this too - all - and i am happy to find a comma to discuss!
Open your lungs with the joy
of spring, as we bound on sprung, <----
metallic strings like puppets;
swing, swing, feel the earth move
as she prepares for Spring!
i know it's correct, but felt too much pause there at the end of the line - without it, its a melodic run on line thats sounds springingly good! What say you?
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Hmmm, no doubt spring is
Permalink Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Hmmm, no doubt spring is getting to you in a big way for the last couple of weeks Jen, lol. You will wear out that poor boys plough if your not careful ;) You didn't mention rabbits! ...or maybe you did LOL. Nice one; you have such a nice way of putting it - no pun intended ;) Great fun!
Chris X
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'Let the crocuses
Permalink Submitted by MistakenMagic on
'Let the crocuses bloom,
poking their inquisitive green fingers
up through the moist, dark soil;'
Love this phrasing ;) Another brilliant poem!
Magic xxx
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Very salacious, this. There
Very salacious, this. There is nothing like getting a little dirt under the fingernails. Bloomin' marvellous :)
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i'm not sure i can add
Permalink Submitted by Curse of 222 on
i'm not sure i can add anything more. the phrasing is delicious, the commas in all the right places (apparently) and the oh-so subtle undertone. makes me want to snuggle up with my love and "allow the parts to re-align"
222?
jason
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