His last Verse

By skinner_jennifer

Wed, 25 Jul 2012
  • 1479 reads
7 comments
 

Grains of words
disorientated...
unruly,
though sharp
the precipice,
meagre scholars,
a doctrine engrained,

like a fragrant perfume,
knowledge fades,
stumbling to achieve
like a jackass,
a sheep...no longer
in the fold,
he silently retires.

Certificate U
Poems
Miscellaneous

Comments

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
A very different piece from you, Jenny, and it works, excellently. I like the short lines and the clipped phrasings. The last stanza, particularly strong. Much enjoyed. Tina

 

Submitted by Mark Heathcote on
Jenny this makes for a very interesting read, there’s a bit of a small but though. And it is simply this that many people aren’t interested in the ones in the fold, it’s them that break-out to carry a new light they find interesting. But again as we all know making something new out of old is an extremely difficult thing to do. :)

Mark Heathcote

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Tina, glad you liked this poem and thankyou so much for commenting, letting me know your thoughts. Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Mark, can I first say thankyou for your comment and reading. I suppose the reader can see the words in this poem as he or she wishes. When I was writing it, I was thinking of an old musician who hasn't got the use of his shaky hands anymore, also his memory is going. All his past talants have left him, so he gives up, because he no longer feels a part of the music scene, that he once belonged too. Hope that explains what I was trying to say. Thankyou again for leaving a message, much appreciated as always. Jenny.

 

Submitted by Shannan on
This one made me feel sad, like... is that it? All that life down to one last verse... truth, truth. Thanks Jenny :-)

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Shannan, I'm sure that we can all go on as we get older finding pleasure in words, it would be nice to think that sharing can go on till we take our last breath. I'm really glad you liked this one and that you were inspired to leave such a kind comment. Thankyou so much. Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Bear, once again I'm so pleased you could understand the message in this poem. I know what you mean about short poems, though I always seem to get carried away when writing and one thing leads to another. I'm very grateful for your comment and thankyou for reading, always appreciated. Jenny.