Elemental ( I P )

By skinner_jennifer

Thu, 07 Feb 2013
  • 5054 reads
20 comments
 

It was in the day...that the
Sun God sent his messenger
Dragos, with wings of mayhem,
to journey into the ether.

To the very centre of the earth
he flew, breathing his flames
of fire into the very core,
that it would burn forever more.

Feminine she was the Moon Goddess,
she knew the depths were torrid, so
delivered drops of water on the breeze,
rain to fall...bouncing off the ocean's surface.

Swirling high above, waves of air danced,
blowing breath into the atmosphere, while
the earth becomes at one with the elements,
surrounded by life eternally struggling to survive.

Certificate U
Poems
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)

Comments

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
A wonderfully descriptive poem, Jenny, and a great take on the I.P. Liked these lines, especially, "Swirling high above, waves of air danced, blowing breath into the atmosphere, while the earth becomes at one with the elements.." Tina

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Thanks Tina, had this one on my mind ever since I discovered the IP of the week. Thankyou for reading and letting me know you enjoyed. Jenny.

 

Submitted by Cavalcader on
new skinner_jennifer Hi! just read great poem,I was going to say the same stanza as Tina. Great for the (IP) this week clever the elements, you have used all. all the best. julie x

Submitted by jolono on
Hi Jenny. For me the last verse was superb: Swirling high above, waves of air danced, blowing breath into the atmosphere, while the earth becomes at one with the elements, surrounded by life eternally struggling to survive Loved it.

 

Submitted by Highhat on
You are in your right element with this IP Jenny- I don'tknow whether you can say that in english? I think you did very well with this. I'm impressed by the stanza about ether.Beautiful.. ;)Pia

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi julie, thanks so much for stopping by and reading. I'm glad you liked those lines too, I kind of imagined the air dancing on the breeze. Really do appreciate your words of support and thankyou so much for letting me know. Jenny. x

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi jolono, it seems that most of the readers of this poem liked those lines, they seem to sum up the IP. Appreciate you reading and letting me know you enjoyed. Thankyou. Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Pia, yes I was really in my element writing this poem for the IP. I nearly thought I was going to be too late with it, because the new IP comes out on Friday. I'm very grateful to you for reading and letting me know your thoughts. Always good to hear from you. Jenny.

 

Submitted by moonphish on
Jenny, this is so beautiful it should be printed in gold on a silken scroll :) - alvin

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi there alvin, you know it's wonderful comments like yours, that, that make writing so special and magical. Thankyou so much for reading and letting me know your beautiful thoughts. Jenny.

 

Submitted by TVR on
Hi Jen, some of your writing (like this poem here) really takes my breath away. You really are accomplished now, in both codes, poetry and prose. I loved this and the way you've expressed yourself. All the stanzas are very good, but the last one really does it for me. Great lines. Swirling high above, waves of air danced, blowing breath into the atmosphere, while the earth becomes at one with the elements, surrounded by life eternally struggling to survive. Very well written. Trev

TVR

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Thankyou so much for reading Trev. I'm so glad you got as much pleasure from reading this, as I did writing it. This subject is very close to my heart and something I think about a lot. Thankyou again for letting me know, always appreciate your comments. Jenny.

 

Submitted by scratch on
A super interpretation of the inspiration point. A fabulous effort Jennifer.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Good morning scratch, I hope you are well. Glad you liked my effort for the IP. I think this was one of my favourites, being interested in nature, elements hold a special, spiritual place in my heart, so I enjoyed writing it. Thankyou for letting me know, always appreciate your words. Jenny.

 

Submitted by hudsonmoon on
I guess it's unanimous, Jenny. We all like a good ending, and swirling waves of air works for me. good one for the IP. Ricn

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Rich, always nice to hear from you, I'm glad those words worked for you, and thankyou so much for letting me know. Have a great Thursday. Jenny.

 

Submitted by Hades502 on
Nice writing. Of course the Moon Goddess was feminine!!! If you look at from a giving-life perspective, most things that are attributed to creation ought to take on a more feminine nature. sorry, I will have to start your longer, continuing stuff at another time. Nice poem. GGHades502

GGHades502

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi there, thankyou so much for stopping by and reading this poem. It was just a piece written about the elements for the Inspirational point. I completely understand about not being able to read longer stories. I know myself it can be quite daunting, there is so much out there. Jenny.

 

Submitted by well-wisher on

I really enjoyed this mystical view of the forces of nature. It reminds me of some ancient creation myth but with a spiritual message at its core. My favourite image in the poem is of rain "bouncing off the oceans surface".

Oh look, a link. I wonder where it leads.

JoHn

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Hi again JoHn,  for some reason none of your comments are showing up on my tracking.  Sorry I've taken so long to reply once again.  I'm happy you got the spiritual message from this poem,  it's always nice to get your in depth comments,  they always let me know you've studied the poem well.  Appreciate you letting me know.  Jenny.