Love's Gone

By skinner_jennifer

Sun, 26 May 2013
  • 2409 reads
9 comments
 

smoky blue eyes
she wore that day,
knowing it would
blow me away,

as behind closed doors
watching as you go,
the world behind us
all we'll ever know,

though memories
we dug up that day...
I just want to convey,
secret passions locked away,

now love's gone,
flowing like water
down the drain...
do you understand
the agony of my pain?

Slip beneath your cotton sheets,
wrapped as like a caterpillar,
safely marooned in your cocoon,
sleeping in your cold, empty room.

Certificate PG
Poem
Poems
Love

Comments

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
I love this, Jenny;-) Just a tiny point, in 'love's gone', you need an apostrophe, because it is an abbreviation of 'love is gone'. The last stanza is particularly effective with the imagery of the caterpillar. "Slip beneath your cotton sheets, wrapped as like a caterpillar, safely marooned in your cocoon, sleeping in your cold, empty room." Beautiful;-) Very much enjoyed. Tina

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Tina, just logged on to find I've made a boo,boo. Thank you so much for the help with the spelling, I can't believe I made that mistake, you'd think I'd know by now. Any way cheers again. Glad you enjoyed this poem and thanks so much for letting me know. Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi denni, glad you enjoyed reading the poem and thank you for letting me know. Jenny.

 

Submitted by prettyrose on
Hi Jenny :)I hope your well. Like all your telented work, brilliant :)I feel the pain in theis Jenny well done. Keep Writing Keep Smiling Trish x

smiley Keep Smiling

Keep Writing xxx

Submitted by scratch on
I really like the third stanza in particular Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi Trish, thank you so much for those kind words. I do so appreciate you reading and letting me know you enjoyed. Thank you again. I'll keep writing and keep smiling. Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Hi there scratch, really glad you read and enjoyed, it's always a pleasure to hear from you. I agree, liked that third stanza too. Thank you for letting me know, much appreciated. Jenny.

 

Submitted by The royster on

HI Jenny,  Oh how I can relate to this.  It's as if you were in my head.  Really well put together.   It seems I have a great deal of catching up with your Dwellers series. I'd better take a week off.   Roy

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Hi there Roy,  sorry I've taken some time to get around to your comment,  not been around.  I'm glad you thought this poem was well put together and I do so appreciate you letting me know your thoughts.  Thanks also for letting me know you're still following my story.  I've not written any more to it for quite some time, so I'm hoping it will give readers a chance to catch up.  You put a smile on my face with your comment about taking a week off to read.  I know the feeling well myself.  Hope you are not working to hard and managing to get some sunshine.  Take care.  Jenny.