Scattered and diffused

"Dad?"

"Is that?" "How can we...?"

"I found a telephone, except it's not actually a telephone....it's for....you can use it to call someone who is..... a person who has died. Of course I had to call you, dad, I never thought I would get a chance to..... I was a child when you ... it was so very sudden. You worked so hard for such long hours that we never had the chance to.... to speak, I never found out the kind of man you really were, what made you marry a woman who..... what dreams you had for your son, before I was born, in between the bullets and the shadows ...I thought that if we could just ..."

"I'm dead?" "I died?"

"That's it?" "That's all you have?" 

"It's - how can I be...."

"Are you.... are you proud of me dad?" I just need to hear you ...."

"This isn't about pride, it's about...it wasn't me who died that night it was... we came back from the engagement party and you went to bed and you didn't, we couldn't.... we tried, we really tried son but you...."

"I know this must be hard for you, dad, we are.... I must feel like a stranger but I'm perfectly alive, perfectly....."

"We still visit your.... every year, even after your sister...your mother buys camellias and puts them in a vase on..."

"Just look around you, what do you see, what do you really see dad, because it isn't, it can't be.."

"I am sitting in my little piece of England, son. This conversation, its not about where I am, it's about DNA crystals, scattered and diffused like the stitches in a wedding veil. It's about hanging from the cliff edge and letting go, finger by finger....

"Dad, I have so much I wanted to...."

"Just let go son...."

"Wait, don't..."

"Let me go."