Through My Window (Poetry Monthly)

Cherry

By Philip Sidney

Sat, 07 Nov 2015
  • 3947 reads
19 comments
 

https://soundcloud.com/philip-sidney/through-my-window

 

Through My Window

I see you

don’t pretend you weren’t looking

I see you

taking a peek

trying to size up the room I am in

the room I am in as I look out             

the shabby room that you judge and

you read

           the story of a shabby woman in a shabby room

not worth looking at all

 

I see you

in the street

on your way

away

with your thoughts and your life and everything before you

I see you.

Certificate U
Poem

Comments

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

I have issues about what is perfomance poetry, too, as I have grown up with all poetry being 'perfomable' – I suppose some engaging the audience more than others!

This little piece made me think how easily we judge others, and judge them to be 'judging' sometimes unfairly. (that is because my  mother-in-law has often said something about someone thinking her stupid etc, with no apparent basis, maybe it was how she viewed people.)

not worth looking at all – was that meant to have another 'at' in it, I thought I caught it in the performance. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thanks Rhiannon, really interesting feedback.  Hadn't realised I'd put the exta 'at' into the performance, I quite like that there are two different versions.  :)

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

so interesting having the extra dimension of the soundcloud clip and comparing your voice with the onein my head as I read! 

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thanks insert.  It's a fun thing to do.  I guess in the reading there are more variations, I think the recording and the written poem are separate pieces really.  I'm not sure I can really do the the voice of the shabby woman, as she's not really me.  Love the spin off thinking of this.  :)

Submitted by jeand on

Hi Helen

Lovely little poem, this, full of hidden thoughts and feelings.

Jean

Jean Day

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thank you Jean.  smiley

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thanks for the cherries.  I think that woman could do with a bit of sweetness.  smiley

Submitted by Bee on

I love the repetitions throughout this. It's brilliant!

Enjoyed the reading, too.

Bee

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thanks Bee :) and thanks for your genius idea. smiley

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

I loved this. Your reading of the line, 'I see you,' was pitch perfect. Reeled me in and held me. I'm certain I'll be giving this a few more listens before the day is out. 

Rich x

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thank you so much Rich!  smiley

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

Lovely poem and brilliant recitation, Helen. Superb execution of this piece just right for the given brief. Well done.

Luigi x

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thank you Luigi!  smiley

Submitted by Pat G on

Oo - seeing into someone looking back at you. It's 360 howl-round. Wonderful.

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thank you Pat.  smiley

Submitted by VeraClark on

This has an air of the sinister. I like the tone in your voice, sets me on edge.

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thanks Vera. smiley

Submitted by Sim on

Interesting verbal rendition - more contained than my interpretation. Your construction of the piece - lines expanding and contracting as the poem progresses - suggests a build up of emotional intensity. I can imagine the woman in the window sounding quite angry and desperate at the end.

Sim

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Thanks Sim :)