Shoot!
By Parson Thru
- 3902 reads
The octogenarian
tore down the wing
tapping the ball
chasing it on
in her
octogenarian
way
Team-mates
and opponents
alike
were left
stranded
With only
the keeper
to beat
she ran on
down
the touchline
staying wide
I don’t know why
she stayed out
on the wing
finally striking
ten yards out
hard and low______________
half shot_________________________________
half cross_________________________
The keeper
also wise
in her years
couldn’t
get down
but had
the angle
covered
Hugging
the post
she knew
the shot
was
hopeless
It hit
the metal
and ran
out of play
A
decent run
though
all the same
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Comments
Parson, oh Parson, pretty
Parson, oh Parson, pretty good. a poem to itself would involve your subject choices. Swep
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I always like poems that
I always like poems that challenge poetry's formal conventions and the shape of the poem seemed to mirror the story being told and give a feeling of dynamism and motion to the poem.
Also you could say that every poetic experiment is like a goal scoring attempt and some are just decent runs while others hit their mark.
I feel this is a poem that certainly hits its mark; the innovative structure also lending itself to the humour of the poem as if it were an animated cartoon in words.
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An interesting structure and
An interesting structure and image. I like the idea of elderly sportswomen - why not?
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Could be a metaphor for a
Could be a metaphor for a life well lived - could be in praise of elderly sportswomen - either way it's a pleasure and our pick of the day! Do share if you like it too.
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Pattern-poems can, I think,
Pattern-poems can, I think, sometimes feel a bit forced in their construction. This poem, Parson, is inspired with its shape complementing and formally adding to - in an exciting way - its subject. And as a footy fan the crowning glory of elderly ladies on the pitch made me laugh out loud! Great stuff!
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