These are the Legs I Ordered.

Gold cherry

By Jane Hyphen

Mon, 13 Feb 2023
  • 2646 reads
22 comments
 

 

These are the legs I ordered

The ones I’ve always wanted

Strong with shape and form

Little in the way of wobble

An ideal length with two knees

Like hinges, with minimal knobble

 

As a child I didn’t really know

How my legs would turn out

My mother’s are quite gnarly

Although they’ve kept her upright

For eighty years or thereabouts

I’ll admit it was vanity, partly

 

I would kneel down and pray

On my pink shag-pile floor

For nice legs, a dog, 

And to be able to write stories 

Three wishes I had and if you

include both legs, it’s actually four

 

All three of my wishes were granted

Although the dog was non negotiable

Through hard work I learned that

My legs were actually quite moldable

Recently I developed one bulging vein

But if I could reorder, I’d want these legs again

 

Certificate U
Poem

Comments

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Thanks for the cherries. I forgot to add the photo which inspired me.

 

Submitted by gletherby on

I love this Jane, and the photo. 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Thank you. I took that photo on my break at work where I do a lot of walking and suddenly felt very grateful for my legssmiley

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Very funny. Legs do age though don't they, and the most important thing is mobility as your mother obviously realised! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Yes Rhiannon, they certainly age and despite a few aches and pains, my legs have been very good to me. They take up half my length after all..

 

Submitted by D G Moody on

Well done Jane; this got me into a poetic mood; about how I was once carried about on my legs when I broke through in jogging - came the day when I only had to summon my legs for a good run.

Dougie Moody

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Thank you. It's amazing what two legs are capable of, especially if you haven't tried running before. Once you start thinking about your body as purely functional, you come to appreciate it all the more. I love the idea of summoning your legs, maybe they summoned you with buzzy energy waiting for an outlet.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

A great poem that spoke to me of being proud and thankful for legs you'd be lost without.

After having my hip replacement I can quite honestly say I'd be lost without mine, they make life much more easier.

Jenny.

 

 

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Hi Jenny thank you for your feedback. I've heard that many times regarding hip replacements and I'm pretty sure that will be me one day, given what I've put my hips through, working in horticulture; thankfully we live in an age where this is possible. Glad to hear you're up and running smoothly again, or maybe just walking smoothly.smiley

 

Submitted by marandina on

I must admit, I hadn't anticipated spending Valentine's Day looking at a picture of your legs, Jane :) Deftly done and glad that they are the ones you ordered. A wish for a dog is non-negotiable. Enjoyed. Paul 

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

You're also looking at a pair of Tesco jeggings (F&F). Thanks for reading Paul. It's true that a dog is both an essential and a dream. 

 

Submitted by Mark Burrow on

Really enjoyed this. It's slightly bonkers and made me laugh. Both good things in my book. 

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Hi Mark, thank you for reading. A laugh delivered is satisfying feedback.

 

Submitted by Di_Hard on

Enjoyed this. My son has somehow managed to reach back into some ancestral gene perfection and has everything I wished I could have had in the leg department,  cannot understand why I always wear baggy jeans as he swans about in long skinnies :0) 

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Hi Di, thanks for reading and commenting. It's funny about the ancestral genes isn't it, kind of the genetic lottery. Swanning around in long skinnies, oh to be young again (but without all the associated anxiety). 

 

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

This wonderful, quirky poem, along with your very impressive legs, is our Facebook and Twitter Pick of the Day!

Please share/retweet these legs!

 

Submitted by airyfairy on

Love the poem and the picture. My legs are what they call 'sturdy'. I used to hate them with a passion, now I love them to bits because they're still working when friends with more shapely pins have had to have bits replaced. Hooray for Tesco jeggings.

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Nothing wrong with sturdy legs, airyfairy. We've been programmed to worship a certain look but it sounds like yours are superior in their construction to many of your peers.Thanks for reading 

 

Submitted by celticman on

four wishes are fine. five at a push. poems make space for more. your stories always soar. as for your knees. That's hard cheese. 

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Thanks celticman. I grant you three wishes for editorial services.

 

Submitted by TJW on

Nice legs.

Much obliged.

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Thanks TJW, I'll take that.