Between the Lines
By Ewan
Sun, 02 Nov 2008
- 1767 reads
2 comments
For me four words can only
have a simple, basic meaning,
dictated by syntax
and punctuation.
For you four words can say more
than I can hope to understand.
Pregnant with the unsaid
and intuition.
'Yes' or 'do', choose either, it
will fill 'I love you' with dark
and complex hints at some
equivocation.
And yet you, with your deeply
telepathic feelings; why not
believe the subtext is
exasperation?
For I do love you.
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Comments
Enjoyed this, it flows
Permalink Submitted by capoeiragem on
Enjoyed this, it flows effortlessly with some lovely internal rhymes and half-rhymes, while the language is simple and uncomplicated, reinforcing the call for transparency that is the poem's central theme. I really liked the tender honesty of the final line, although saying that the line itself feels a little abrupt. Maybe you could finish on a couplet, such as:
'for the truth is
I do love you'
I can see how you might want to retain the impact of a single line to reinforce the protagonist's exasperation however, so please feel free to ignore me. Either way this is a good poem. Thanks!
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This is a very good poem for
This is a very good poem for with simple language it incorporates notions of great complexity. A real tour de force.
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