Rain watching

By elizabethw

Sun, 10 Feb 2008
  • 620 reads
2 comments
 

Mesmerised by the rain
Jumping flashes of light on stone
Fireflies and glow-worms
Spooling sparking threads
Tadpoles darting
In the pool of the streetlamp’s reflection.
The rain crackled in the puddles.
I sat, and watched, and wrote.

Certificate U
Poem
Miscellaneous

Comments

Submitted by Sooz006 on
I presume the tadpole line is symbolic and not meant to be taken literally but it pulled me out of the poem for a second as I tried to work out how they could survive in a light reflection and no water. I think that needs a bit more clarification. Is the writer sitting behind glass looking out of a window? Again if she's sitting in the rain, I have a mental image of a lady in a droopy straw hat, wth tendrils of sodden hair falling over a soaking wet writing pad with smudged blue ink splatters dripping off the page. But it's still a lovely little snap shot piece. Nice one.

 

Submitted by elizabethw on
Thanks for the comments! I did wonder about the inside/outside factor and if that could confuse - she is supposed to be indoors, watching through the glass, rather than getting soggy! Will have a think about how I could make that clearer. And yes the tadpole is supposed to be symbolic, another image of how the rain looks in the light. Maybe I need a couple more words in there to capture that more precisely...