Often at Sunset

Cherry

By JoseHdz

Tue, 15 Feb 2011
  • 2373 reads
17 comments
 

I still think of you
Sunshine
Often at sunset
When the clouds
Begin to dissipate
Toward the moon
I think of your hair
So long and so straight
I think of your eyes
So shy and so soft
When I pour
Another amber ale
I wonder if someone
Else is kissing
Your freckled cheek
I wonder if perhaps
He is
Making you laugh
Out loud
In a melody so sweet
I should have never
Let you go beyond
The misty beach
My mind is a blur and
My liver is diseased
I still think of you
Sunshine
Often at sunset

Certificate U
Poem
Love

Comments

Submitted by Highhat on
a bit sad

Submitted by Beeme on
Poignant and beautifully expressed. Particularly like the last lines. Beeme xx

k.

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Highhat-- Hopefully it wasn't too depressing! On second thought it does seem a bit sad :) Beeme-- Thank you for the nice compliment :) I am glad you liked the last lines, they are my favorite as well. cheers, jose.

Submitted by Amanda-Moo on
I am in love with this poem. The way it flows and your honesty in it. I think it's beautiful.

Amanda.

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Amanda-Moo-- I am very pleased you liked the flow and honesty of it; I worked rather hard at it in hope of making it seem effortless. I appreciate your feedback! cheers, jose.

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on
it does seem effortless. It's brilliant - the last five lines especially are perfect

 

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Thank you, insert! I am quite pleased the ending went over well; I was very much hoping for that. Thanks for the feedback! cheers, jose.

Submitted by Dynamaso on
Beautiful - evocative, captivating and beautiful.

 

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Thank you, Dynamaso. Glad that this piece captivated you; It was fun to write it! cheers, jose.

Submitted by fatboy74 on
Another beauty this one Jose and so well done. :-)

 

Submitted by JoseHdz on
many thanks, fatboy. always appreciate your kind words! cheers, jose.

Submitted by ScoZen on
jose, hello. It has all been said, great piece.
ScoZen

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Wonderfully honest, jose;-) Tina

 

Submitted by JoseHdz on
thank you both. appreciate the feedback on this piece. cheers, jose.

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Thank you, Sunday. Glad this piece rang true~! cheers, jose.

Submitted by RachelPatricia on
Beautiful, Jose, well done on the cherry :)

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Thank you, penandpaperdreams. Glad you liked it. Your username is my personal favorite, by the way! cheers, jose.