She'll break your heart

I know she will break my heart
and it intrigues me
she will break the news that she has done something terrible
and I will say Well obviously. It's who you are.

I've been warned by so many people.
'She will break your heart,' they tell me
usually unsolicited although sometimes I am mischievous and say
'Everything will be okay, won't it?'
which always prompts a hand rubbing on my arm.
'You need to be careful with her,' they'll say all concerned
and I look forward to the showdown.

I am delighted she is going to break my heart.
I will cry.
I look forward to letting it all out
I've been meaning to do that for a while now
and this is as good an opportunity as any.
Nothing beats being inconsolable
seeing my friends worried faces, not knowing how to deal with me.
'I've never seen him like this,' I want them to say
as I am writhing on the floor, howling,

It will make up for all the times I've been relentlessly optimistic
“We will get there in the end”
“It's not going to rain.'
“It'll all be okay in the morning.”
All of those times I've wanted to say something
let everyone know that I am so far from being okay
that there's something wrong that's making me unhappy
but I always keep things to myself.
So often I've needed advice
but no-one has offered any
apart from the occasional “you shouldn't drink so much”
"you should get new shoes"
“you need to put a jumper on.”

“She will break your heart”
they tell me and I can't wait
it means at least we'll have been close enough for her to do so.