THE ONE IN THE NEST

Gold cherry
Poem of the week

By seashore

Mon, 08 Feb 2016
  • 11144 reads
39 comments
 

 

If you were my daughter I'd weep,

watching you stumble and fall

down the corridor -

a constant stream of drool

oozing from your slack, open mouth

your hair matted, clothes stained

 

catatonic, mute -

only your eyes,

bulging, staring - slowly

swivel in my direction, beseeching

help me, help me -

 

your arms reach out,

but because I do not know you

I peel you off...

and wave goodbye

 

Later, helpless and alone

behind closed doors,

I remember

you were once my daughter

 

And I weep.

 

 

Certificate 12
Poem
seashore
Love

Comments

Submitted by seashore on

Yes I knew it was you...I won't ask why the name change.  Hope you're doing okay and thanks for the Gallery info - will look it up.  Still do gallery visits when possible, but no painting I'm afraid (for as long as I've not been writing) as lots to sort out re daughter.  Busy fighting the system but forever hoping her illness may eventually be controlled with the right treatment.  

Anyway, good to be back and able to re-connect with familiar (and less familiar!) names!  Must check out what you've  been up to under your new identity...  

Submitted by EB on

Nothing overdone in the writing, makes it all the more meaningful, and the loneliness of 'later' punches the reader as much as the parent. I felt the helplessness. A beauty of a poem. 

Sincere thoughts with you.  

Submitted by seashore on

Thank you EB - particularly for picking up on the 'loneliness and heiplessness'. Too true, and kind thoughts much appreciated.  Sorry about duplicate reply but can't work out how to delete...

Submitted by seashore on

Many thanks EB - especially for picking up on the loneliness and helplessness aspects.  Really appreciate the feedback...and your kind thoughts.

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

This is our Poem of the Week - congratulations!

 

Submitted by seashore on

Having not done any creative writing for two and a half years, I'm delighted!  Thank you so much.

Submitted by celticman on

it's an eruption of the mind; one that cannot be ignored. 

 

Submitted by seashore on

It won't be if I can help it - this has given me the strength to make a formal complaint to the Mental Health Trust concerned, so we'll see.  Nothing to lose now.

Thanks, celticman.

Submitted by seashore on

Great feedback flagged and I thank you so much, magicdarer.

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