A BRIDGET JONES'S DIARY MOMENT ( I.P.)

I said that I would do it,
just this once for a friend,
who was ill with a stomach bug,
she had to pay her rent.

The lights they were blinding,
as I stood there in bra and pants,
feelings of humiliation,
taking hold I tried to dance.

"Get them off," said An Unseen Voice," to me,
I peered through the lights, nothing I could see.
"Come on lady you gotta do your thing,"
shouted that Unseen Voice to me again.

I started to gyrate, the music it was great,
I closed my eyes, my cheeks were red,
undoing my bra,
I did what they said.

The crowd shouted, "more!"
so I turned my back on them all,
in accordance with their wishes,
over my shoulder, I blew many kisses.

I felt a sudden panic,
with my hands clutching my breast's,
I turned to face my audience,
I wished that I was dressed.

I then threw my hands down, gave a little wiggle,
then with a panic, I started to giggle,
I saw this pole in the middle of the floor,
they all shouted, "do it, you know what it's for."

Then that Unseen Voice, shouted for more,
I lifted my legs up, right off the floor,
onto the pole, I let myself slide down,
going to fast, I fell with a thud to the ground.

When the show was over,
standing in my birthday suit,
I did a little curtsy,
they shouted, "hey! that's cute.

And when I saw my friend Elaine,
I said, "I'll never do that again,"
I did as I was told, because I had no choice,
being told what to do, by An Unseen Voice.

And with my very sore bottom,
I went back to my flat in Rotherham,
slipped into my nice warm bed,
at last to rest my weary head.