The Solitary Baptism
By sunshine
Fri, 19 Jun 2009
- 1931 reads
13 comments
She walked with dignity and grace into the river
shuddering almost imperceptibly when
the cold grey water rushed to welcome her
swirling gently against her frail thighs.
She stumbled slightly as the reeds tugged
at her ankles, but they could not hold her back.
One step, then another inching forwards
the water lapping against her breasts
her dress now lifting and floating
as she slowly, slowly, submerged.
Deeper, deeper she went until
her straight and rigid body swayed,
the power of the water testing her resolve.
Then suddenly, only her long auburn hair
now made dark and heavy
could be seen on the surface
floating like flotsam from a wreckage.
This sweet Ophelia had found her peace.
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Comments
Oh, this is quite beautiful,
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Oh, this is quite beautiful, Margot. It had me guessing all the way through as to the subject of the poem...until the last line, of course.
"Then suddenly, only her long auburn hair
now made dark and heavy
could be seen on the surface
floating like flotsam from a wreckage..."
These lines made a particular impact on me.
I think they are so effective because up until then, the tone of the poem is quite factual...and then this, with its evocative imagery. Brilliantly done.
Another one I shan't forget.
Tina
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The Pre Raphs are the
The Pre Raphs are the subject of a huge upsurge in interest, critical re-evaluation and a few exhibitions. Reckon I can see Millais' floater clear as day.
Good poem
Ewan
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Popped back to say congrats
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Popped back to say congrats on the cherry, Margot;-)
Tina
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new SUNSHINE THIS GREAT THE
Permalink Submitted by Cavalcader on
new SUNSHINE THIS GREAT THE LINE FOR ME DEEPER,AND DEEPER SHE WENT UNTIL HER RIGID BODY SWAYED THE OWER OF THE WATER TESTING HER RESOLVE. I HAVE 2nd
BOOK ON PRE-RAPHS AND THE PICTURE HER LYING THERE
YES A CHERRY What does new mean at beginnings.
I FOR A MOMENT WAS THINKING OF RELIGOUS BAPTISM
god bless julie
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What a beautiful poem. I
Permalink Submitted by sarah wilson on
What a beautiful poem. I agree with Tina as to my favourite lines. Truly evocative. Well done on the cherry. sarah x
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Very good work Margot; it's
Permalink Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Very good work Margot; it's all been said and I agree with all the good stuff, very visual and paints a vivid picture. Loved it!
Chris XX
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Stunning, a beautiful
Stunning, a beautiful picture painted, and so very sad. The ending is perfect. A deserved cherry.
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A superb poem which keeps
Permalink Submitted by luigi_pagano on
A superb poem which keeps one absorbed and intrigued until the final, revealing, line.
Excellent work.
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