Missing Him

Cherry

By hudsonmoon

Sat, 16 Jul 2016
  • 4511 reads
17 comments
 

I hear the sound of his voice
playing in my head
'oh, father!' he'd say
'oh, son!' I'd reply
sylvester and son
two looney tunes
having a laugh

I miss the way 
he made his mother smile
when he called her 'ma'
his unconditional love
of friends and family
his stance was solid
he always knew more 
than we taught him

he had a talent
with the artist's pen
just like his mother
and for putting words on paper
it pleased us to know
he had the inclination 

mostly, I miss hearing
the word dad
the urgency and trust
the word had when a question 
was involved
'dad?'
'yes, sam?'
someone needed me
'sure, sam
happy to help
let me know how things go'
I needed him back

'hey, son'
'hey, dad'
I say the words
like a mantra
I play both parts
it kills me 
that one part is missing -
the best part

the one who was meant
to thrive
to be a husband 
a father
a life-long companion
to the passion and love
of his life

god, how we miss him
he was so damn wonderful

Photo credit: Childhood painting of Sam McDonough

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Comments

Submitted by Penny4athought on

Oh my, I have no words here but such strong emotions. If tears could be written I could phrase what this created for me. The love and loss unbearably fragile and heartbreaking. He is forever in your heart..and will remain forever with you.

 

 

Penny4athought

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

Simple words but they say everything I think you want them to beautifully - and that's a wonderful picture too Hudson

 

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Thank you, ladies. I do what I can to fill the void. Sometimes these pieces come to me in a rush. And I do my best to write them down as fast as I can. Like someone whispering in my ear, and I'm taking dictation. It's an exhilerating - and weepy - experience.

Rich xx

 

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Many thanks for the cherries, Eds. Cherries are cheery.

Rich

 

Submitted by seashore on

I feel your pain. What I'd give to hear my firstborn call me 'Mum' again, but it will only happen in memories or in dreams now. I'm waiting for that whisper...

Beautiful writing.x

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Thanks you, seashore. Big hugs to you. May those memories and dreams be with us always.

Rich x

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

They leave a whole that nothing else can fit. My heart's with you both Rich.

Parson Thru

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Thank you, Parson. That hole seems impossible to fill. The best we can do is try to fill it with memories and carrry on as best we can.

Cheers to you, brother.

Rich

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

What a beautiful relationship, reminds me to cherish the ones I take for granted.  My heart breaks for you. x

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Thanks, PS. Do cherish them. They're worth the effort and love you put into it.

Rich x.

 

Submitted by VeraClark on

a poem full of life, full of love. So pleased you got this piece out. x Sam's picture is gorgeous

 

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Thank you, Vera dear. I always feel better when one of these writes happens by. Gives me such comfort to be able to get it to paper.

Rich x

 

Submitted by celticman on

that's sad. I wish I could say something stupendous and wise, but in that gap there'd be only lies. 

 

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

You're wiser than you know, celtic. Strange thing is, anytime I've sat down to write about grief - words fail me. Then these stream of thought things start filling my head and I can't write them down fast enough. They're healthy outpourings. It been almost two years ago, but it may as well have been yesterday. That we both manage to smile and push on amazes me. The power of having postive, loving people in your life for support. Cheers, celtic.

Rich

 

Submitted by airyfairy on

Everyone's said it really, Rich, but it is a beautiful poem.  They are damn wonderful.  x

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Thank you, af. They sure are.

:Rich x

 

Submitted by jolono on

You got me! Tears as I'm typing. Love you two.