I really really hope

I must admit.

I was a little dismayed when I heard that you'd strayed off the edge of the map, and into that blurred gap between bright light and shade, where, it would seem, you have decided to linger a while, stood on some metaphorical ledge and wondering which way to go. You know you can't stay in that grey place for good, and would that I could drag you back with my words, you'd have heard from me a long time ago. You've got a choice to make. Either follow my voice, I'll call your name, I'll try and lead you back the way you came, or never wake. Find a deeper sleep and by yourself, at some dark hour, go creeping off the edge of the world, and God knows I hope you don't but He knows too I'd never stop you if you do.

You know I only want you to spare me from the broken heart. The 'torn apart'. I don't want to have to 'start again', it's too much work. To have to learn from someone other all those funny quirks that make you you, unique, and maybe a little bit of a freak as well, but what the hell. We make a decent pair.

Spare me from the tears, too. And year after year of lonely anniversary that only I will celebrate, if that's the word. And maybe two weeks late someone would say, 'Important date, was it?' And what could I do but turn away and pretend I hadn't heard.

Don't leave me on my own. To face the great unknown alone, I don't know where to go. Show me the way. Or at least take my hand again and help me walk instead of crawl, or be there to break my fall, or just answer when I call for you. Please don't leave me in this state. Don't condemn me to this life of hate, and bitterness, and rage, because this fate should not be mine at such an age.

I'll wait. With baited breath to see if God is cool with taking you a little later. Because you'll make a fool out of me, you'll see. After such a crap love ode, owed to a chap I'd be mad to give up on, you'll make a mess out of me. This is a prayer for your plight, my dear, my knight in Primark armour. To choose it right, that if you come across a tunnel stay away from the light, to continue the fight, and I really really hope you'll be all right. I really really hope you'll be all right.