The Dark Times

A collection of poems written either about or during my struggles with mental health

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Anger inside

It's so hard to imagine a feeling stronger than love, well there is one and it overwhelms you, in some cases you feel strong in others, weak. It's hard to get rid of this feeling

Bad Habits

(After much deliberation I have decided to repost this. I wrote it in a time of distress and the connotations within the piece no longer apply to my current state) Sometimes you just go back,

Broken too

Spilt in two, the red runs from the centre, to form a pool of sorrow on the floor, this pool so full it could burst, unleash everything I ever felt, into the atmosphere and poison the air,

C.B.T

head throbbing body shaking heart pounding tears breaking, eyes look away, struggling to stay. I can hear the words she's saying trying to get me to...

Daddy issues

My dad is wonderful My dad is great Perfection combination of farther and mate, Always just and always fair Tries his best to love and to care. But...

Eight years

Eight years since I last shead a tear either through pain or through fear, through heart break or sorrow or through joy or angst, I "manned up" as they say not letting emotion give me away,

False happy

Feeling fine most of the time well enough to format a rhyme at least, but would this feeling cease if I stopped taking pills, I'm ill you see, felt...

Getting 'clean'

10 days clear 10 days living in fear of myself, I need to take care of my health, no meds, more dread, more voices in my head. More cuts, more scars...

Hate who i've become

I have changed so much, and I hate who I've become, I would never have used a girl for sex, now i just want the rebound, I would of never made anyone i care about feel unloved,
Cherry

My get-away

15 feet from the ground I'd say, no one thought I'd get up here where the air is ever so slightly clearer, and all the trees and houses don't obscure the horizon. The horizon,

My problems

Everyone has them, some call them faults others call them problems or issues, but we all have things that we don't need to or want to do but do anyway, my problems are as follows:

Sharp edges

Don't want to feel this way any more, like my heart has smashed all over the floor it's shards sharp at the edge. We can talk and be happy but then we'll say one thing

The terror in your head

Insecurities are like daemons in the night, they creep up on you to give you a fright, and just when you think that you might have banished them they...

The worst feeling

have you ever had that feeling, where you're numb but in so much pain? where you can hardly breath but are on the brink of a panic attack? where you can't sleep

Then they came back

They all came back just like a slap in the face, a sudden snap back to ways of old things I'd told myself not to think, but everytime I reach the brink of freedom from these thoughts,

These ideas give me nightmares

These ideas give me nightmares, and I lay there and scream, these thoughts seem to real to be a bad dream, they chew me up and spit me out, leaving me without a doubt that things can

Track record screw up

In every single thing i look to deep, sometimes over thinking so much i can't sleep. I lay awake all night and wonder what something means, is there a subtle message

Why can't I

Why not i've felt like i could of all day, had it inside me all this time, and yet on the outside i'm still fine, i just wish it would show on my face and thats not something

You might be right

There will always be days where you feel like your best just isn't good enough, where no matter what you do no matter what you say, it will only be 'OK'. Why do these days always come