Distant to guilt
By Highhat
Sat, 16 Mar 2013
- 2967 reads
17 comments
Yours swims the ocean like neon fish
Among the corals
Now and then resting
On the silence
Only my eyes see
My language is kept in this box
Placed in clear sight,
It dives into the coursing veins
That carry the heaviest throbs
And seal my lips
Yours swirls and winds, yawing its way
Through uncharted passages with walls
Of faint desire
Impressed with carved runes
Making my yearning visible
Reclaiming each day anew
We drown dreaming, downing
This liquid feeling, filling
Out the holes in vessels
Containing our separate frames
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Comments
You're on top form, Pia.
Permalink Submitted by The Walrus on
You're on top form, Pia. This is an evocative piece drowning in ambiguity like all your best poems, and the language is beautiful.
'Yours swirls and winds, yawing it’s way
Through uncharted passages with walls
Of faint desire
Impressed with carved runes
Making my yearning visible' - that's luvverly.
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Lovely again Pia. You are
Permalink Submitted by Parson Thru on
Lovely again Pia. You are certainly on form. Wonderfully veiled in ambiguity. Good cherry pick.
Parson Thru
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We drown dreaming, downing.'
We drown dreaming, downing.' the words wash over you. Well done Pia.
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Bloody good poem, Pia, it
Permalink Submitted by blighters rock on
Bloody good poem, Pia, it hit the mark for me and a royal title to boot. Yummy cherries all-round. I like this because it reminds me of the way I used alcohol on the rickety merry-go-round of comparing myself against others. Oh, for the joys of youth again, or just plain hindsight.
I found this as straight-talking as you've ever written, from the heart but definitely through the head.
Yawing its way (you gotta drop the apostrophe before I have a stroke)
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Highhat you set the bar very
Highhat you set the bar very high but I think this is my favourite of your poems. It is just fabulous, it flows, it sings, it rocks.
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Absolutely beautiful Pia
Permalink Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on
Absolutely beautiful Pia
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A lovely swirling rhythm to
A lovely swirling rhythm to this poem Pia. It feels like a dance, like a waltz, spinning round and floating. Nice one :)
M. Dugdale
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Mmmm. I agree HipPriest.
Permalink Submitted by Parson Thru on
Mmmm. I agree HipPriest. Like a waltz.
Parson Thru
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