Scattered Seeds

By threeleafshamrock
Wed, 25 Feb 2009
- 3035 reads
11 comments
The horses graze by the big Oak,
The plough is in the barn.
The bridles and collars
no longer gleam;
they wither,
crusted.
The blade no longer cuts the furrow
Though the land lies succulent
The meadows sighing in
the summer breeze;
take me,
ripened.
In Flanders fields the strong hands lie
as still and cold as winter.
No more the reins will
wrap broad back,
taking the
strain.
That brow once veiled by wanton curl
While leaking sweats of labour,
lays covered, in another’s
field by mud,
life blood
oozing.
And so the new grass will be sparse,
not lush, for lean the growth;
when seeds are strewn
so heedlessly, for
careless winds
blowing.
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Comments
Superb structure and rhyme,
Superb structure and rhyme, very tight, and difficult subject matter dealt with gracefully,
J x
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Loved this and I agree
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Loved this and I agree wholeheartedly with Jennifer.
My very favourite stanza:-
"That brow once veiled by wanton curl
While leaking sweats of labour,
lays covered, in another’s
field by mud,
life blood
oozing."
Much enjoyed, Chris:-)
Tina X
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The structure is brilliant
Permalink Submitted by MistakenMagic on
The structure is brilliant Chris. Such an interesting perspective to take on this subject. Well done!
Magic xxx
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'A trio of lovely ladies'.
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
'A trio of lovely ladies'. I like that description a lot, Chris. Many congrats on the more than deserved cherry, by they way:-)
Tina X
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I really like the structure
I really like the structure to this, Chris. It really works well. Good work, mate.
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Language, style, structure
Permalink Submitted by lenchenelf on
Language, style, structure complement each other...smashing. Thanks for sharing it L
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