Childrens Verse

By shades

Quirky Kids Verse
  • 1543 reads

A Fright for Seven Knights

By shades on Wed, 02 Mar 2011

On the seventh day of spring from all corners of this land, Seven knights arrived to fight for the fairest maidens hand. The maiden sat upon a hill, the atmosphere was tense,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

An Elephant's Got Our Football

By shades on Thu, 14 Jul 2011

An elephant’s got our football, And he just won’t give it back, He saw we have some biscuits, Now he says he wants the pack. We really want our football, But we want our biscuits too,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Ask me When You're older

By shades on Wed, 15 Sep 2004

Ask Me When You're Older When I was quite young and I asked my mum, Those questions that made her go red, She'd say "oh my love, good heavens above,...
Humour
Story
Certificate U

Babies

By shades on Wed, 15 Sep 2004

Babies Babies when first born just giggle and burp But don't really do much at all, It's not that surprising they're a little upset, Being squeezed...
Humour
Story
Certificate 12
Cherry

Beasts

By shades on Mon, 07 Mar 2011

What happened to the dreams I had, And the beasts I thought I knew? Those magical, mystical, wonderful beasts, That were kept at London Zoo. There’s no mention of a gwif inside,
Children's
Poem
Certificate PG

Big Old Me

By shades on Fri, 27 Jan 2012

Look at my big eyes, To help me see at night, Look at my big teeth, All shiny, pearly white, Look at my big ears, Stuck to my big head, Look at my big mouth, That helps to keep me fed,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Bill and Bert Go Fishing.

By shades on Tue, 18 Dec 2012

Let’s go home, said Bill to Bert. I’ve had enough of fishing, My clothes are wet, my ankles hurt, And half my tackle’s missing. Stay a while, said Bert to Bill,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Captain O'Neil

By shades on Thu, 21 Jul 2011

Captain O’Neil’s got a boat made of steel, He sails out from Cork every morning, She’s a very old boat, built in 1902, She could sink any day without warning.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Dangerous Dog

By shades on Wed, 15 Sep 2004

Dangerous Dog I went and bought a dog last week, I got him for a pound, I just showed up at the rescue place, And left with this ugly hound.
Humour
Story
Certificate U
Cherry

Dunderbeck (reworked)

By shades on Thu, 01 Sep 2011

There was a man named Dunderbeck a butcher was his trade, On the street he sold old meat and the sausages he made, But people rarely bought his meat his business was joke,
Children's
Certificate 12

Elephants Shoes

By shades on Wed, 02 Nov 2011

George is a big grey Elephant, The kind you’d like to meet, He has huge grey ears, large brown eyes , And four huge grey flat feet. Thump, thud, thump, thud, Is how his rhythm went,
Children's
Certificate U

Fishermen's Sons

By shades on Mon, 10 Dec 2012

John and Lee Dunn are fisherman’s sons, Their trawler is called Mary-Jane. They both have blond hair, they’re an odd looking pair, In fact oddly they both look the same.
Children's
Certificate U
Cherry

Fruit

By shades on Fri, 30 Nov 2012

I’m sure I’ve been forgotten, I’m at the bottom of the pile, I know I’ve been forgotten, But I was happy for a while. When I was shining up on top, You squinted from the glare,
Children's
Certificate U
Cherry

Gingerbread Man

By shades on Thu, 17 May 2012

I’m the gingerbread man, the gingerbread man, Golden and bold with my gingerbread tan, Fresh from the oven and baked to perfection, The number one choice in your cookie collection.
Children's
Certificate U

Granny

By shades on Wed, 31 Aug 2011

I like watching my granny, I find her so funny, The way she can sit there just knitting. I know that it’s cruel, But I’ve hidden her wool, And now when she sits, she’s just sitting.
Children's
Certificate U

Growing Pains

By shades on Fri, 17 Feb 2012

Little Penny Pimlico, Wasn’t all that tall, She checked her height most every night, And drew upon the wall. Now every week that line would creep, A tiny fraction more,
Children's
Certificate U

Hermit

By shades on Tue, 07 Dec 2010

Angus McNab is a wee hermit crab. Who lives in the Mull of Kintyre. Now that Hermit can shift he’s pretty darn swift, And is known in those parts as the flyer.
Children's
Certificate U

Hippopotamus

By shades on Mon, 25 Feb 2013

Oh hippopotamus, What a hippopota-fuss, You’re splashing in my fishpond, Now you’re rolling in the dust. Oh hippopota-please Would you hippopota-cease, This aggravates my allergies,
Children's
Certificate U
Gold cherry

I'm Scared

By shades on Sat, 11 Dec 2010

I’m scared of bumps, Of bangs, Of clangs, Of pictures of monsters, With claws and fangs, Of dogs, And cats, Of mice, And rats, Of wrinkled old ladies, With woolly hats,
Children's
Story
Certificate U
Cherry

Isabelle The Zombie Slayer

By shades on Thu, 13 Dec 2012

Isabelle was listening to the BBC in bed, When suddenly her wireless hissed and pop the set went dead. Young Isabelle she shrugged it off, though far from being the norm,
Children's
Poem
Certificate 12

Jennifer Stein

By shades on Fri, 24 Feb 2012

Jennifer Stein was a girlfriend of mine, She was one of the girls at my school, She was smart and wore glasses enjoying her classes, I was scruffy and acted the fool.
Children's
Certificate U
Cherry

Loch Ness Mess

By shades on Thu, 03 Mar 2011

Tommy Mc Dee and Angus Mc Kenna. Went to the Loch to fish for their dinner. They had waterproof trousers and jackets to match. And a large wicker basket for holding their catch.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

My Favourite Sandwich

By shades on Tue, 24 Jan 2012

The sandwiches my mother makes, Are never that exciting. I unwrap them every lunchtime, But they’re really uninviting. If only I was taller, And I could reach the bread.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

My Speckled Hen

By shades on Tue, 04 Dec 2012

I bought a happy speckled hen Just ‘cause I love eggs, She had ruffled feathers on her back, And these knobbly looking legs. She had funny little beady eyes
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Nigel the Knight

By shades on Mon, 03 Dec 2012

When playing games and contact sports, Nigel dressed in shirt and shorts, And forfeited traditional dress, For something weighing slightly less. It’s not easy for a modern Knight,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Not a Nibble

By shades on Wed, 14 Mar 2012

On monday morning Joe went fishing, And came back after tea, Any luck? his mother asked. Not a thing, said he. He tried again on tuesday, But not a fish was landed,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Not trying to bug you.

By shades on Fri, 20 Jul 2012

If I were a centipede I’d treat you to my charms. I’d wear a hundred pairs of shoes And scamper up your arms. If I were a dragon fly I’d hover ‘round your nose. Or if I were a beetle
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Our Next Door Neighbour

By shades on Wed, 31 Aug 2011

Our next-door neighbour, our next-door neighbour, I spied through a gap in the fence, A wooded hill and a watering hole, And the forest looked terribly dense.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Oysters

By shades on Tue, 07 Dec 2010

An old man limped to his fishing boat, His fishing cap on his head, A young boy walked beside the man Why do you limp? he said. I’ve always limped was the mans reply,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

parrot

By shades on Wed, 15 Sep 2004

Parrot I wanted a red parrot, the kind that really talked. The one the pet shop sold me just occasionally squawked, So I persevered daily to teach...
Humour
Story
Certificate 18
Cherry

Parveen and the Elephants Dream

By shades on Sat, 15 Jan 2011

Parveen lived in a small dusty village Where life can sometimes be hard But Parveen was happy; she had friends and a family And an elephant in her back yard
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Penny Pimlico

By shades on Wed, 15 Sep 2004

Penny Pimlico Little Penny Pimlico, In buttoned coat and hat, Walks to school in leaps and bounds, To avoid the pavement cracks,
Humour
Story
Certificate U

Precious Pets

By shades on Mon, 06 Dec 2010

I met a new girl who likes pets, So I bought her a cat just to please her. After two or three days, she took in some strays, Now I’ve two polar bears I my freezer.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Rosie the Cheese Munching Monster.

By shades on Thu, 28 Jun 2012

Oh Rosie dear please, Oh Rosie dear please. Could you try to eat something but crackers and cheese? You consume wheels of Wensleydale two at a row,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

Scary Bear

By shades on Wed, 28 Mar 2012

Oh hairy bear Oh scary bear I’m over here You’re over there I see you look I feel your stare I run You chase A crazy pair Through the tangled wood We tear The curve I swerve
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Scary Dave

By shades on Wed, 16 Nov 2011

I live at number twenty-two, At the top of Peppermint Road, John the lizard’s three doors down, Next door lives Colin the toad Behind that door at twenty-four.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

School Report

By shades on Fri, 13 Jul 2012

At school my A was “Awful” My B was “Bad intentions” My C was “Could do better” My D was “Due detention” My E was “Ever Failing” My F was “Failed to care”
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

The Denture Adventure

By shades on Mon, 28 Mar 2011

A deep-sea diver dived down for a fiver, To collect Mick McCarthys false teeth. Poor Mick had lost ‘em, a fiver it cost ‘im, To retrieve his lost teeth from beneath.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

The Eel Of St Ives

By shades on Tue, 15 Feb 2011

There’s a well known tale of an enormous eel, That can be seen off the coast of St Ives, The locals say it’s twenty feet long, And makes fishermen fear for their lives.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

The Fubalon

By shades on Fri, 29 Apr 2011

I’ve seen a brown bear in the woods And a polar bear on ice, I’ve seen rats and cats and squirrels, Voles and moles and mice. I’ve been chased by armadillos,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

The Future Hill

By shades on Tue, 20 Mar 2012

I’ve heard of a hill in the future, That is covered in red and gold stars, Where the locals are small purple people, Who drive round in apple pie cars.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

The Giant Squid

By shades on Fri, 18 Feb 2011

Four Welshmen and a collie dog, Rowed out from a harbour near Gwent, The morning was cold with a low sea fog, Off to the lighthouse they went. They went in search of a giant squid,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

The Lighthouse Keeper

By shades on Thu, 21 Apr 2011

The lighthouse keeper turned off his light, And wide-eyed stood in awe, He dropped his teacup in his fright, At the terrible thing he saw. He went outside to survey the scene,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

The Magical Cow

By shades on Tue, 20 Aug 2013

There’s a magical cow called Priscilla, And I’m trying to teach her to fly, She’s incredibly odd and behaves like a dog, When she chases the cars...
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

The Spanish Knight

By shades on Thu, 02 Dec 2010

There’s a story told from days of old, That a knight from southern Spain, Travelled over to the port of Dover, To find an English Dame. He bought with him his violin,
Humour
Poem
Certificate U

The Three Legged Dog

By shades on Mon, 06 Dec 2010

There’s a brand new arrival at the rescue pound. Turbo’s his name and he’s now world-renowned. He’s got the veterinary world in complete disarray,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

The Ticklish Whale

By shades on Thu, 23 Feb 2012

It was an average day when the men of the bay, Boarded their boats to set sail, But the harbour mouth where the boats sailed out, Was blocked by a sleeping blue whale.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Poem of the week

Three Billy Goats Gruff

By shades on Thu, 07 Jul 2011

Long ago three goats grazed in pastures green and hilly. Their mother kept it simple and named the three goats Billy. Having a name that’s just the same as your brother’s bad enough,
Children's
Poem
Certificate 12

Tiger Tiger In The Fridge

By shades on Wed, 13 Jul 2011

There’s a tiger in the fridge, screamed Mum, And her face told me she meant it, I crept along and had a look, I think she must have dreamt it. It was big and bright with orange stripes,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Gold cherry

Top Deck Conversation

By shades on Thu, 16 Jun 2011

So she called me on the weekend, And I was like, No way, Then I was like, When? and stuff, And she was like, Today, So she was like, He friended me, And I was like, You’re lying,
Children's
Poem
Certificate 12
Gold cherry

Trains

By shades on Tue, 12 Jul 2011

We are sorry to inform you, But the cancellation’s due to, The weather being too hot, And it’s snowing quite a lot, There’s a curry on the track, The driver’s hurt his back,
Children's
Poem
Certificate 12
Cherry

Two Brothers Sailed.

By shades on Wed, 23 Jan 2013

Two brothers sailed from the isle of muck, They took a silver coin for luck, A barrel of laughs and one of beer, And a miniature mule to carry their gear,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Underwater

By shades on Wed, 08 Dec 2010

When walking in the seabed I stood upon a Plaice, Who grumbled at me bitterly, screwing up his face. I apologised profusely, and trying to explain,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Gold cherry

Visiting Grandma

By shades on Mon, 25 Jul 2011

Oh hello dear, It’s you, come in. You’re looking gaunt, So small, too thin. Have a drink, Nice cup of tea Just one sugar? I’ll make it three. Some cake I just baked,
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Wishington Green (the fire)

By shades on Wed, 13 Apr 2011

Drama
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

Wishington Green (the flood)

By shades on Tue, 19 Feb 2013

Wishington Green got rained on this winter, The weather exceptionally poor, Mr. Stern who’s the mayor has lived there for years Said he’d not seen it this bad before.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Zookeeper

By shades on Wed, 25 Jan 2012

I’ve had hugs and kisses from snakes and lizards, Had my ears nibbled by a giraffe, I’ve been buzzed at by bees that stung both my knees, Quite funny but I didn’t laugh.
Children's
Poem
Certificate U
Cherry

The Carpet Man

By shades on Thu, 09 Jan 2014

I wanted carpet fitted, To cover all that wood, So I called the local carpet man And I thought he’d understood. He said with heavy accent. “I fit you...
Humour
Poem
Certificate U

Mable's Gable

By shades on Wed, 30 Jul 2014

Last week I had the easy job Of painting Mable’s gable. Paint it green she said to me As we sat around her table. I’ll go and get my tools I said And...
Humour
Poem
Certificate U

Mr Snake

By shades on Thu, 31 Jul 2014

Oh Mr snake, For goodness sake, You ate the buns And chocolate cake, And all the pastries That I baked You ate before my eyes. Oh Mr snake, Oh deary...
Children's
Poem
Certificate U

Blue Face

By shades on Thu, 04 Dec 2014

It's dinner for two, me and you, The Italian place in town. But your phone’s lit up and your face is blue, Now you’re scrolling up and down. I push...
Humour
Poem
Certificate U